persembahan dari hati

i had fight wif mom.never talk to each other today. when i arrived from group discussion. she wasnt at home. neither my dad.i felt asleep til 6pm. and realized my mom and dad went to Bagan Lalang for sesi pujuk mak by dad. tu pun i tau bile i call abah. coz abah knew already if this fight berterusan. mcm2 akan jadi tau. ye la sape lagi nak entertain mak kalo bukan anak pompan dia yg tercinta kan? i tatau nak wat ape. ade sket salah i actually. but i pk gak bukan 100% salah i coz im already 22. and i deserved a self respect from other people especially from my own family member. yeah im stil the youngest and most people will told me 'im stil the baby in my family tree' but hell no. in certain part of life, i need sum space and respect from everybody. TQ

burning inside part two

when we were expecting everything gonna be ok but it suddenly turn to be not ok.

when we were expecting a person will wait for us til suddenly the person not there.

make me angry. at him and myself also. i hate being perfect but i do try my best.

and when i knew he didnt even realized im doing my best, im soOoOo dissapointed.

the worse gath ever!

hey blog
arini i p midvalley. ade such a mini gath bebudak cenel uitm dalnet. so i decided to participate since eerin and pert ajak beriye iye. i thought its gonna be fine until the deffuser came and join us. fine if between him and me ade history yg tak berapa bagus. we're no talking to each other since that incident happen. fine wif me then. and i thought by the time goes by, bende tu akan dilupakan gitu saja and he and me will be cool aite?

rupenye i je sorang pk cmtu. i mean pk cm ok la bende dah lepas, lepas je. skang kite borak cm bese la. dari mula dia dtg wif myvi and joop dia tak tego i. fine. dia borak pun tak pnah borak ngan i. fine. until one moment when i try to talk to him kat cosmic bowl, dia berpaling muka dari i yg sedang berkata kata. what the fuck la kan? who he think he is? dia ingat aku ni sampah ke ape? siot nye laki. my mood suddenly turn off. and mase tu jugak rase nak balik je. sbb rase nak nanges bile dia wat cmtu. tp i sabar lagi. pas men bowling p plak mapley luar midvalley.kat sana pun dia buat bodo je ngan naz. am i the one yg sensitive or what. dia tak de tny i ke, nak ckp ngan i ke, pandang ke. tetibe i rase cm org paling bodo dlm muka bumi ni p gath ni. i should follow my heart. bile hati dah rase ragu2, i patot tak pegi je. tapi bese la degil.

tujuan i post ni pun bukan apa. konon2 mintak2 la dia bace kan even i know la dia takkan bace. bia dia tau i REALLY REALLY REALLY PISSED OFF sama dia. i want him to know bout this. thanks.

best regards,
YOUR EX SO CALLED BABY

im not ready

assalamualaikum
dikala i post this blog i baru je balik dr umah makcik i. i mean the closest aunty. i call her as ucu. she is my father's sister. one of my father's sister actually. tp ni la yg paling rapat. kalo rase saket ati ke kat umah, lapa ke, gaduh ngan abg nak tgk tv ke, mesti akan p umah ucu. bese la sana yg ade sepupu i nama boy. pastu tv tade rebut2. boy mesti ngalah nye ngan kakak sedara dia nih. and sebot pasal makan. mesti bes. even kadang2 lauk pauk simple je. tp mesti dpt makan nye. siap tapau lagi balik umah. every malam raya umah tu juga i melepak. sbb anak anak tiri ucu sume ade sana ( ucu kawen ngan his husband yg mmg dah ade anak) well mmg meriah la duk sana. i ade ramai anak saudara la kalo di ikotkan. pak usu naz? mmg bes. mmg sporting. kalo ngan anak2, cucu2, atau anak2 sedara nye ( i la tu) mmg sporting. kire tade la kene bebel ke, kene ceramah free ke. mmg bes la.

pak usu masuk hospital last 3 weeks. doktor kata usus pak usu pecah. the second day pak usu masuk ward, i went to the hospital. suprisingly, pak usu had been admitted in the icu room. i ter pk 'hey serious sgt ke pak usu saket?' well i knew the answer rite now. lepas beberapa hari kat wad icu, doktor kata he will be fine. ubat tidur yg diberi dah habis. but sadly, pak usu tak juga sedar. bile lawat pak usua, i tak pnah lupa ckp pada pak usu yg i dtg tgk dia. after 20 days dlm wad icu and di bawa pula ke wad isolasi kerana takot kuman yg ade pada pak usu menjangkit pada org lain, pak usu pergi tinggalkan kami semua pada ptg khamis 15 Feb 2007. mase tu i dlm kelas. i tatau nak act mcm mana. i tros pegi umah ucu. well i saw my late uncle for the very last time. i tried not to cry. but it didint work. i cried. im not ready for losing him. sebelum maghrib juga arwah pak usu selamat dikebumikan. org kata kalu kite meninggal malam jumaat, tiada seksa kubur. tade serangga dtg gigit pak usu. alhamdulillah kan?

i tak lupe sedekahkan al fatihah, surah yassin tiap kali i teringat kat arwah pak usu. i miss him actually. when im at his home, masih terasa dia ada sekeliling tu. apa yg i regret, pak usu dah bukak mata sebelum dia hembuskan nafas yg terakhir. but no respon bile dipanggil. maybe dia nak tgk anak anak dia, cucu cucu dia, sedara mara dia and paling penting isteri dia. i terpk juge. macam mana la raya i lepas ni. umah sape plak i nak p? stil sama ke condition ni lepas arwah pak usu takde? i did asked one of his grandson, ingat tak muka Aki?(aki = atuk) shidi kata dia tak ingat.agak nye sbb since pak usu dlm wad icu, kanak2 tak leh masuk tgk. bile nak kebumikan pun, shidi tak sempat jumpe. shidi kat skola. tade sape ade masa nak p amik dia. but arini bile i tny balik, shidi kata dia mimpi Aki.Aki suh dia blaja rajin2. and i did asked once again. and shidi kata dia dah ingat muka Aki.

walau dimana saja roh pak usu sekarang, ella harap pak usu ditempatkan di kalangan org2 yang beriman. amin.ella redha dgn takdir Allah swt. Al-Fatihah.

aku pasrah

looking at the tittle its true. pasrah je dgn suratan ni. well this is my 2nd group assignment which needs us to present. i buat on my own and give sum credit to other group members. yey. bagus nye saye. so tonite i heret satu member dr group lain bantu i wat assignment tu. hehehe abes tu nak harap yg lain tu byk sgt aktiviti and syarat2 nak dikenakan.
well actually im glad went out with him. hehehe and im glad dia offer diri nak tlg i.LOL ade niat tersembunyi actually. smalam lak went out wif him, jeri and azra. jalan2, tgk wayang, makan2. kinda have cool moment. sonok gak lepak ngan diorang. of course pasnih akan kuar bersama lagik. hehehe. berbalik pada si dia. td mase anta dia kat umah sewa, dia bg i sumthing. memule i kata tanak. tetibe dia kuar kete dgn membawa henpon i skali. of course la i wont leave the house without my henpon. hehe. so i decided to wait and see. pastu i balik la. sumtime kan i rase cm nak ckp yg i admire kat dia. but hey its too early kan? lgpun i sekelas. tak lari ke mana pun.hehe jgn ade org tekel dia sudey. but hey btw agak2 dia tau tak i ske dia? hmm. cmne nak bagi hint?

tears of my heart

aaaaaaaaa
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa tensionnnn.
my inner prob kembali lagi. this damn period. tertekan tol. i tried not to think bout it. but i cant.
uncomfortable in classes. rase mcm penat2 satu badan. sengal2, cepat letih
tambah2 group presentation i sorang2 wat. yg lain sume buat tatau. tak membantu AT ALL!
jgn kata menaip ke, bg key point pun tade. everything on me. asked them to send it to Dr Aniza also tak bole. i jugak kene wat. dah la perut ni saket mcm org beranak (agak je) i yg kene bersusah payah buat sume. wah kalo cmni la gaya nye, Dr, pls do give me extra credits ok?
huwaaa. rase nak nanges je. dugaan eh? im too tired for all this. and akhirnye akan nanges juge.

my 1st quiz

arini i ade quiz utk paper operation management. last class the lecturer told us there will be an objectives and true false question only. but it end up wif 7 subjective questions. hah apa nak wat. belasah saje laaaa. tapi paham2 je la. everyone not ready for the quiz. masing2 baca ala kadar sbb ingat leh tembak je kalo soklan objective. i was lucky out of 7 question i manage to answer 5 yg i rase confirm btolll. hahaha poyo sungguh. hah bese la bile ngan kwn2 kan selalu share jawapan. i ni bengang la ngan bebudak kiri kanan i. punye la saving anjeng nak bg jawapan. ok, i try to be positive. maybe dia nak uji kemampuan dia gak kan. fine wif me la kalo org dah tanak bg. but bile dah nak abes quiz tu kan. ade ke dedua tu expecting i akan beri diorang jawapan? hahaha hell no la kan. wah kan main lagi jawapan dia tanak share. jawapan aku dia nak lak miahahhaha. well i tau la diorang ni ala ala selfish sket. masing2 nak ke depan tp lupe lak diri tu pun masih memerlukan org lain. ntah la. i sedar skang ni apa apa pun i have to work hard. jgn masih mengharap ade rakan akan bantu mcm time diploma dulu. ade je akan bantu in studies.

malang sungguh nasib

waaa arini sangat malang nasib ku ini
dah la kelas start kul 10.30 tp kul 7.30 dah sampai uitm sbb takot tade parking la katakan. sini kan parking fascilities very2 poor. dah p kelas 10.30 ade lak kelas yg lunch hour tu sampai 1.30. kata sampai kul 1.20 skali sampai 1.30. makan pun tapau je then makan dlm kelas. pastu ade kelas sampai kul 4. masa abes kelas tu mcm nak ujan. ku gagahkan jua menapak jauh ke parking kete sbb bile pk kalo ujan lagi teruk kan? tgh2 menapak tu ujan tak turun step by step. teros turun dgn lebatnya. berlari la daku. sesampai je kat tangga yg tinggi tu, cube la naik tangga dgn sepantas mungkin. skali sandal yg daku pakai licin membuatkanku terjatuh ke depan tangga. bayangkan tgh ujan lebat tu la dan dan nak jatuh kat tangga. naseb la tak tergolek ke bawah ke ape. cume terkedepan je. cube bayangkan kalo tergolek ke bwh tros ke jalan besar. naya je kalo kene langgar lak kan? dah jatuh ni jangan kata la kan basah nye cmne. basah kuyup!! bile dlm kete baru la perasan yg lutut lebam. huwaaa.balik2 tros mandi sbb takot demam. mak picitkan la lutut sambil bebel2 pasal safety first. hah sambil dia tekan2 kat lebam. saket sangat2. malang sungguh arini =( moral the story jgn lupe bawak payung even payung yg ade hanya payung besar!

introduction to business matter

waaa tensen nye. arini suppose ade 2 kelas je start kul 2.10 sampai kul 6. but too bad my 2nd class which is at 4.10 tu ada prob. penat je baca chapter 1 sbb ade kuiz. lecturer tu masuk2 je panggey 16 nama and dia kata sape yg dipanggey itu please do leave the class now. siot sungguh!! dia kata ramai sangat dlm kelas ni. padahal dlm online registration maximum ppl 50. masa ni la nak tau kwn yg baik atau tak. kwn yg i kenal sekor pun wat tatau pasal i kene halau. lecturer tu suh masuk jadual yg dia buat which is every monday TO thursday at 12.30 til 1.20pm. gile btol. tu kan lunch hour. how bout kelas kul 2 lain subjek. kan penat! siot sungguh!!!! ikot hati mcm nak drop je paper ni. lagipun kinda tough sbb i amik 7 papers. tp pk balik bile nak abes degree kalu nak drop je kan? aaaaaa tensennnn

Gateway to Excellence

last weekend semua pelajar bachelor yg baru masuk ade a kind of orientation. tema nye Gateway to Excellence. adoi leteyyyy. Started on friday evening. speech from dekan, timbalan dekan, the Majlis Perwakilan Pelajar (MPP) nak kenalkan diri, bla bla bla. Sabtu lak kene ade kat sana 7.30 wit pakaian sukan. dah la majlis tu start lambat. kene duduk bersila lak tu atas lantai.ceramah2 bla bla bla. pastu ade a really2 fun aerobic session. really2 fun. seronok sgt. pastu ceramah lagikkkkk. then ade aktiviti berkumpulan. i di masukkan dlm kumpulan 22. projek yg kene wat to make sure 2 biji telur tak pecah bile dicampak dari 3rd floor. ade la bahan2 yg dia bagi. but unfortunately 2 biji tu pecah hahaha. tema group i BOLEHLAH hehe ptg tu jugak settlekan ptptpn sampai kul 8pm. balik je teros tido. letih. then ahad ade lagik. program bersama fascilitator. ok la fun jugak. cume penat je kan? sampai ptg. balik je tros wat assignment yg kene anta ari senin. penat btol weekend kan?

my 1st week in uitm shah alam

hello
for the past 3 days dalam uitm shah alam, i nye kelas ari senin started on 8.30 and finished on 6pm. tp kelas kul 2.10 cancelled. lecturer finance agak punya suara yg agak rendah. my operational management lecturer kinda classy. lelaki um0 30's (married LOL) ok la. agak sempoi. selasa lak ade kelas kul started 2.10 which is kelas marketing. cancelled jugak hahaha saket hati. and kelas kul 4 til 6 pun cancelled = penat je gosok baju kurung hahaha. rabu lak i ade kelas kul 8.30 which is intro to international biz. hah lecturer ni agak pelik slang nye. kate nye dia pnah keje kat canada for 9 years. haha kinda maskulin guy. adoi menakutkan! dia asked student sume letak kertas yg tulis nama atas meja so senang dia nak panggey. then kelas management plak kul 10.30 cancelled sbb lecturer tu mc. but dia dah pesan next time kalu nak masuk kelas dia, girls kene pakai hand bag, heels, make up bla bla bla. mati la sayaaaa. next kelas kul 2.10 kelas public speaking. kinda bored actually. hadoi bole ke i tahan 3 years dlm uitm tu.

sabar itu separuh dari iman

daftar uitm 6/1/2007 [sabtu]
taklimat pengecualian kredit 9/1/2007 [isnin]
jumpa advisor 10/1/2007 [selasa]
tak pegi kelas 11/1, 12/1, 13/1 [rabu, khamis, jumaat]

im not feeling well. its all about my period matter. so i went to see the doctor which has been recomended by one of my friend. the doctor gave me 2 kind of medicines. one for stopping my bleeding and one to gain more blood coz as the doc said, im having low blood pressure. well i really2 hope my decease will end soon. hey imagine when u have to face wif a period non stop for a month! and sumtimes it will be extra2 heavy. poor me. but currently i think its getting better. i hope it will be better and better day by day. hope so

Sarip's Birthday

Today is Sarip's birthday. Its 22nd birthday. May God Bless her and may she in a good health always. We celebrated sarip's birthday on 3rd january at pizza hut. actually it is not just a birthday party, its a farewell for sarip also. she will registered in uitm melaka this friday. sort of first time sarip jauh dimata nih. hehe well i'll pray for her. hepi besday!

my 1st Jan 2007

well 2007 arrived without notice. plus another 1 year to my age rite now. hehe im 22? but offcially 22nd on April. this picture taken on new years eve at bukit bintang wif sum frens. person beside me was nadia. one of my bes buddy! we're really enjoy that moment.
as a conclusion for 2006 2 major resolution have been achieved. 1st nak grad on time for my diploma. 2nd nak further studies by the year 2007. so alhamdulillah dedua i dapat realisasikan. for this 2007? belum pk lagi nak azam apa lak. i let u know later ok?

happy new year =)

Biggest Dream in 2006

well finally i dpt offer further studies. degree in finance. uitm shah alam. adoi nape la shah alam jugak yg i dpt kan? but alhamdulillah atas rezeki ni. well 2007 ni kene mula dengan azam baru and a brand new me again?

my pain

hey
alhamdulillah by the time i post journal ni i dah getting better from the pain i suffer since yesterday. sebenarnye i ada masalah dgn organ2 dalaman kot? unstable hormon buat i nye period tak menentu. sampai jadi la incident limpah ruah. hehe tau ke eh maksud nye? period yg melampau banyak nye. padahal dah 15 hari i period. pelik kan? well to me benda ni dah tak pelik. i penah kene cmni bile i 15 years old, when im 18 and tetibe bile 21 kene balik eh? mcm janji2 lak. 3 tahun sekali LOL. tp alhamdulillah arini dah kurang. i makan ubat yg stable kan hormon. harap2 tak la kejap je elok kan? bukan apa. tak selesa tau. when u have to change every 1 hour. letih! dah la banyak hilang darah. of course la dahaga, lesu, sengal2 badan. mintak2 dah tade la kejadian ni lagik

Hurt - Christina Aguilera

Seems like it was yesterday when I saw your face
You told me how proud you were, but I walked away
If only I knew what I know today
Ooh, ooh

I would hold you in my arms
I would take the pain away
Thank you for all you've done
Forgive all your mistakes
There's nothing I wouldn't do
To hear your voice again
Sometimes I wanna call you
But I know you won't be there

Ohh I'm sorry for blaming you
For everything I just couldn't do
And I've hurt myself by hurting you

Some days I feel broke inside but I won't admit
Sometimes I just wanna hide 'cause it's you I miss
And it's so hard to say goodbye
When it comes to this, oooh

Would you tell me I was wrong?
Would you help me understand?
Are you looking down upon me?
Are you proud of who I am?

There's nothing I wouldn't doTo have just one more chance
To look into your eyes
And see you looking back

Ohh I'm sorry for blaming you
For everything I just couldn't do
And I've hurt myself, ohh

If I had just one more day
I would tell you how much that I've missed you
Since you've been away
Ooh, it's dangerous
It's so out of line
To try and turn back time

I'm sorry for blaming you
For everything I just couldn't do
And I've hurt myself by hurting you

Gegak Gemilang Astro - Klang

siang tadi p la gegak gemilang astro kat klang. well nak p pun ade 2 reasons.
1st - barang2 cosmetic silkygirl arini jual murah2. yeah mmg murah
2nd - i nak jumpe sofaz hahahaha klaka kan?
but ni la kenyataan. sofaz nye 2nd album is much better than the 1st one. ntah kenapa i leh berminat ngan lagu2 nye. bes2. dpt tgk dr jauh jadi la. and ade la artis2 af. ada zainal alam kadir, ade kru, ade aznil hj nawawi. ok la jugak. but i ingat kan besar sgt karnival nye. kecik je. tak la happening mcm sure heboh by tv3 tu. hehehe ada la bende yg i bought just now. a mascara, a lip gloss, a hair color hahaha and not forget a perfume. silkygirl - loving you. not bad la bau nye. bole la pakai utk sekadar berjalan sini sini. park kete pun tak la jauh. luck kot? hehe

pheww!

heylo2

hah alhamdulillah my childhood fren selamat nikah ptg td dlm kul 5 ( 8 DEC ) kat masjid Ar-Rahimiah, Klang. actually i lebey rapat ngan adik dia, sarip hehehe tp kakak nye pun stil my childhood fren gak. hehe

so dr ari khamis aritu mmg dah duk terperuk kat umah sarip, doing this, doing dat. mcm2 la buat. ye la org nak kawen. dr pagi2 sampai ke malam2 baru balik umah. naseb la lalu pintu doraemon je ( pintu blakang) since umah dia btol2 blakang umah i. miahaha tak abes lg keje ari khamis, tadi pagi pun dtg gak sampai ke ptg.

hah i noticed satu bende la. bile event besar cmni. bukan nye confirm sedara mara akan dtg tlg. mungkin ade dtg tlg tgk je hahaha. i lak poyo tlg kan? haha takpe la. ikhlas i tolong nih even mmg penat. mcm2 bende kite nampak sana sini cacat cela sbb this is first marriage for Syed Alwee's family hehe. takpe la kan. mana yg i tau, i bitau anak2 dia. share2 la kan knowledge sbb mungkin dr kecik i ni dah didedahkan ngan rewang2, bungkus2, rebus2 telur. sbb mmg dr dulu mak abah bawak p umah saudara mara tlg2 pape yg patot. and i assume family diorang tak didedahkan dgn knowledge cmtu. so terkial kial gak la hehe. enough saying the bad things! hey mana ade apa apa event yg 100% going smooth kan?

hah malam ni lak ada what we call 'malam berinai' hah fyi malam berinai tu bukan la malam org nak pakai inai hehe as sarip thought hehehe its like malam tukar2 baju, photoshoot, tepung tawar sket ehehehe kire dgn sanak saudara terdekat la. so i sempat la gak nyemak2 amik gamba ngan pengantin. hah gamba nye later k? dah 2 ari i dtg sana pakai baju lusuh2 je then malam ni i pakai a baju kurung wif a tudung. everyone dlm tu kata 'ey ella dtg, dah lawa dah' hahaha klaka kan? ye la siang2 dtg pakai tracksuit & shirt. tetibe malam ni glemer sket hehehe

after the ceremony, i ngan sarip, adik sarip, ayu, fana p mcd. hah upacara MENGHARGAI DIRI SENDIRI hahaha ayat yg baru je gune. selepas berpenat lelah membantu kat umah sarip, dah sampai masa nye utk melepak hahahaha. i will be at sarip's house again tomorrow. hah kali ni pakai glemer2 lagik. makan free session haha

Selamat Pengantin Baru to Syarifah Nurhayati ( kak etty ) & Nizam
COngratulations!

Dedicated to Neem

dear neem

how r u? hehe eceh cm bg email je. anyway hah i dah berjaye letak picture kat profile tu. thanks ya. hah dr dulu i tatau nak wat cmne. finally berjaya gak i hehehe. take care neem